Costa Rica's World Cup Qualifier: The Schedule, How to Watch, and If It Even Matters

So, the US, Mexico, and Canada get a free pass to the 2026 World Cup because they’re hosting the party. Great. Good for them. While they’re busy planning catering and picking out drapes, the rest of Concacaf is engaged in its biannual ritual of beautiful, glorious chaos.

They call it "qualifying," but that word feels far too organized for what’s actually happening.

Every cycle, the so-called experts trot out the same tired script. "Panama, Jamaica, and Costa Rica are the teams to watch," they say, nodding sagely into their webcams. It’s a comfortable, predictable narrative. The only problem is that nobody seems to have sent the memo to the teams actually playing the games.

Because right now, the "expected" teams look like they’d rather be anywhere else.

The So-Called "Giants" Are Asleep at the Wheel

Let's start with Costa Rica, the perennial "tough out" of the region. Three games played. Three draws. Zero goals scored. Zero goals conceded. That isn't a football team; it's a statistical anomaly. It's a philosophical question about whether a game can even exist if nothing happens. I've had more exciting experiences waiting in line at the DMV.

Imagine being a fan, painting your face, and screaming for 90 minutes, only to watch your team play to a 0-0 stalemate against Honduras. It’s a cry for help disguised as a soccer match. Are they just coasting on the fumes of past glory, hoping their reputation alone will scare teams into submission? Or are they genuinely this… inert?

Then you have Jamaica. The Reggae Boyz, with their Premier League talent and big-time ambitions, went out and got slapped around 2-0 by Curaçao. Curaçao! I’m willing to bet half the Jamaican squad couldn't find their opponent on a map before kickoff. This is a bad look. No, 'bad' doesn't cover it—this is a five-alarm dumpster fire of an embarrassment. A team with that much individual talent shouldn't be getting shut out by anyone in this group, let alone losing decisively.

It begs the question: what is going on in these locker rooms? Is it arrogance? Complacency? Do they just assume they'll flip a switch when it "really matters"? Newsflash, fellas: it all matters. Every single point dropped in these early stages is a potential nail in your World Cup coffin.

So Who Actually Wants This?

While the supposed big dogs are napping on the porch, a few other teams have shown up ready to fight. Look at Group C. Haiti, a nation that has endured more hardship than any of us can possibly imagine, is sitting at the top of the table, undefeated. They went on the road and handled Nicaragua 2-0. They’re not playing fancy, tiki-taka nonsense. They’re playing with grit, with a sense of purpose that seems to be completely absent from their more pedigreed rivals.

And in Group B, it’s Curaçao leading the pack. After humbling Jamaica, they’re sitting pretty with seven points. This isn't a fluke. This is a team that understands the assignment. It’s a mess, offcourse, but it’s our mess, and they’re thriving in it.

Concacaf qualifying isn’t a chess match played on a pristine lawn. It’s a bar fight in a muddy parking lot after last call. The teams with the polished reputations and the fancy boots are getting their teeth knocked out by the guys who showed up with nothing to lose and everything to prove. That’s the brutal, unvarnished truth of it.

You look at the standings and you just have to laugh, because none of it makes sense, and maybe that's the whole point... It reminds me of trying to get decent Wi-Fi at a hotel. You’re promised a premium connection, but what you actually get is a flickering, unreliable signal that only works if you stand in the corner of the bathroom. The "favorites" are the premium promise; Haiti and Curaçao are the flickering signal that’s actually getting the job done.

Then again, maybe I’m the crazy one for expecting anything different. This is Concacaf, after all. Logic and reason checked out years ago. We're just here to watch the fireworks. And right now, the teams we expected to provide them are bringing nothing but duds. It ain’t pretty, but it’s honest.

Somebody Has to Win, I Guess

Let's be real. The best part of this whole circus isn't rooting for a winner. It's watching the teams that are supposed to win find new and inventive ways to completely implode. Costa Rica's quest for an all-draws record is far more compelling than another predictable qualification. Jamaica getting humbled is a dose of reality that the whole region needs. This isn't about finding the best team; it's about seeing who survives the chaos. And I, for one, am here for the chaos.